I applied for an internal promotion and didn't get it. The feedback was polite but vague: I need to demonstrate more leadership. Now I'm back in meetings with the colleague who got the job, trying not to read every decision as evidence I wasn't good enough. I want to ask my manager for two or three observable behaviors I can work on over the next quarter. If you've been through this, how did you rebuild confidence without pretending the rejection didn't sting?
Recovering confidence after a failed internal interview
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- recovering
- confidence
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I think confidence comes back faster when you separate the role from your worth. The promotion not landing does not mean you’re bad at the j...
I think confidence comes back faster when you separate the role from your worth. The promotion not landing does not mean you’re bad at the job you have now.
True, but I wouldn’t pretend it’s not bruising. Sometimes the useful move is just to be a little less available to your own spiral for a while and keep a list of concrete wins from the last month.
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If your manager is decent, ask for a few examples of what “more leadership” already looks like on your team. That can turn a fuzzy label int...
If your manager is decent, ask for a few examples of what “more leadership” already looks like on your team. That can turn a fuzzy label into something you can actually practice.
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Ask for the behaviors, not the verdict. “What would leadership look like in practice over the next quarter?” is a cleaner question than “why...
Ask for the behaviors, not the verdict. “What would leadership look like in practice over the next quarter?” is a cleaner question than “why wasn’t I enough?”
I’d make them name observable things too, like taking point on a meeting, owning a follow-up, or bringing a decision instead of a problem. Vague feedback is frustrating, but specifics can still come out if you keep nudging gently.