We give five-minute warnings before leaving the playground, but sometimes that makes the final five minutes a negotiation marathon. With no warning, departure is an unpleasant surprise. We're experimenting with a clear sequence—one last activity, then shoes—and fewer repeated countdowns. Has anyone found that predictable routines work better than clock-based warnings for a child who struggles with transitions?
Deciding how much notice to give before transitions when warnings sometimes create more resistance
- parenting
- notice
- give
- transitions
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1 reply
We got a better result when we made the transition the same every day, even if the timing changed. If the cue is the routine, not the clock,...
We got a better result when we made the transition the same every day, even if the timing changed. If the cue is the routine, not the clock, there's less room for bargaining.
I like that idea, but what happens when they're deep in something and the routine itself becomes the battle? That's where we still struggle.
3 replies
We had better luck with a fixed routine than with countdowns. One warning, then the same sequence every time: last swing, shoes, water, go....
We had better luck with a fixed routine than with countdowns. One warning, then the same sequence every time: last swing, shoes, water, go. The timer became background noise after a while.
Same. Repeating the five-minute thing can turn into a negotiation clock, which is somehow more exhausting than just leaving.
Predictable routines usually help because the child can see the end coming without having to manage a number. The number is often the part they argue with.
Yep, mine would hear ‘five minutes’ and immediately turn into a tiny lawyer. ‘Five more minutes of what, exactly?’